Like crystals, bones have piezoelectric properties (bending or adding pressure produces an electric output). So there's that. On a serious note, I'm happy that my post resonated with you. I hope AZ is treating you well and wish you all the best!
I love this, Antila, thank you. As true as anything as it's always about the crazy feelings and how to process them. Cue your exceptional tips 1 and 2 for exactly this purpose, perfect!
I'm happy you enjoyed it Sue. Tip one is a synthesis of several lessons and coping strategies taught by others. Tip 2 I came up with out of sheer despair and frustration.
"An empath is a person who feels these things directly, often called an emotional sponge." Careful there, Antila. Remember the common place kitchen sponge...just resting on the sill of the sink, a petri dish menace waiting to unleash the next mega-cootie black plague.
Lol @ "the love sponge" /insert Seinfeld reference.
Thank you for the cautionary image of the bacterial bomb sitting there. Stagnation, energetic or physical, is the cause of most disease vectors, IMO. A little movement, and some clean, flowing water, can go a long way.
The jedi mind tricks is one reason I have had to harden my heart at times. I think I have fallen down when it comes to finding balance between hard and soft heart. Both are needed in different situations. Thank you for your thoughtful response. Much love <3
You are hilarious and insightful, my anti-labelist friend. This is a curse I've never considered quite this way. But I have thought a lot about the idea of 'suffering with others' and that it doesn't reduce their suffering one iota, only increases the net amount of suffering in the world.
For my oldest daughter, as a grief counselor, she takes her boundaries seriously and talks about the longevity of caring as inversely related to the intensity you allow. My middle daughter is not so naturally empathetic and I find that I can share more with her of other people's situations that I'm trying to sort out. And the youngest is my partner in seeing heartbreak on a global scale without getting dragged down by it. We share, in a sense, a hardness of the heart. If we didn't have it, we'd have to block it out of our awareness, for self-protection.
I recently told someone to keep your awareness large but your sense of well-being small. Look only at 'how am I right now? Are things okay for me?' You can't find meaning in anyone else's circumstance, only your own. Giving attention to how things work out in your own life can bring the trust that they'll work out, in the long run, for everyone. Not that bad things won't happen, but that they won't happen without meaning and purpose. Thanks for this perceptive essay.
Thank you for the complementary labels and the restack, especially friend, my friend. I theorize that those who are chosen to experience suffering with others are given the opportunity to help process those feelings and to transmute them into something useful/helpful. Like how dung can be be gross, but properly treated, can become fertilizer that helps beautiful things to grow, thrive and share the beauty. I can attest to "increase the net suffering in the world," when I would stew in the suffering, in self perceived defeat, the effects would spread out like spilling a can of paint.
I feel like I have been in the general type of space of all 3 of your daughters, at one point or another. Working hard on my boundaries, being able to look at the "spilled paint" of others without stepping in it, and the hardness of heart, which seems like layers of scars that can be a capacitor or impedance regulator of sorts, as you said a kind of self protection.
' longevity of caring as inversely related to the intensity you allow.'
'how am I right now? Are things okay for me?'
'Not that bad things won't happen, but that they won't happen without meaning and purpose.'
Love these gems and will need to examine and polish them up in my mind.
Thanks for sharing and giving me more to think about. I appreciate your existence!
Having the ability, and willingness, to dial up a healthy level of hardness of heart is useful in remaining sane and happy. Too much tugging on one's heart strings can't be a good thing.
Thank you for the question Vbarnet. I was unclear about that statement. Also this article was a brain dump that I wrote while dancing with insomnia. I'm sure I could have said more, but the post was already long by the time I reached tiredness.
To me, aspects of empathicness can feel like a benefit sometimes, added insight/information about a person or situation and has brought about wonderful and strange/unique outcomes. Sometimes, the impressions served to confuse things further and I experienced, what I felt at the time, to be unwanted outcomes. I should have stated that being an empath, to me, can feel like a blessing or a curse, not that it is actually either one. What I shared is a mashup of how I have felt and thought about this topic at various times throughout my life, not how I feel about it currently.
I have attempted erasure AND suppression many times, I used to drink heavily when I was in a low vibrational state, to self medicate. Drinking and other methods never worked for very long, and the lessons that were intended became more painfully learned, because of my poor coping choices. Honestly, I think it is not possible to rid one's self of something the Universe wants one to have. Nor would I choose that option were it offered, now that I have had more perspective and time.
To FINALLY answer your question, the outcome I desire in help/training would be to be able to have more clearly recognized boundaries between internal, self generated sensations and those that arise from outside. Not knowing the difference is what has caused issues in the past.
Sorry for the longwinded, rambling response. I will reread my article and your thoughtful and well appreciated comment. After I have eaten some food and done other wake up rituals, I may feel the need to clarify more.
Good points and thank you. Love the mental image of electromagnetic wave transmission. And very good point on even the external can be modulated by by willpower.
I love rabbit holes and do study arcane philosophical ideas. I look forward to future discussions with you!
OMG I FEEL THIS IN MY BONES
Good to read from you SC!
Like crystals, bones have piezoelectric properties (bending or adding pressure produces an electric output). So there's that. On a serious note, I'm happy that my post resonated with you. I hope AZ is treating you well and wish you all the best!
I love this, Antila, thank you. As true as anything as it's always about the crazy feelings and how to process them. Cue your exceptional tips 1 and 2 for exactly this purpose, perfect!
I'm happy you enjoyed it Sue. Tip one is a synthesis of several lessons and coping strategies taught by others. Tip 2 I came up with out of sheer despair and frustration.
I did, thank you. I know the feeling, they have a tendancy sneek up on you!
Thanks for this post. When I drive on the freeway, I pick up the trail of vibes in the lane in which I'm traveling. Interesting feeling.
I experience that and sometimes find myself yelling at drivers that didn't even get close to me.
"An empath is a person who feels these things directly, often called an emotional sponge." Careful there, Antila. Remember the common place kitchen sponge...just resting on the sill of the sink, a petri dish menace waiting to unleash the next mega-cootie black plague.
Have a care too about some nefarious Obi-Wan Kenobi doing Jedi mind tricks on you too. Gird thy loins...harden your heart. Same same-o. Don't be this guy. https://www.startpage.com/av/proxy-image?piurl=https%3A%2F%2Fx-default-stgec.uplynk.com%2Fausw%2Fslices%2Ff0a%2F45bf940c346f431c9be273b8942ab6eb%2Ff0a3ea41c0fc4b3a8afa48f146e36469%2Fposter_fc0f3fec76074f6eae68b444867844ed.jpg&sp=1711561741Td17e19f290a56fd0a128023f59989bb3519d40164b7d258320b34899e2274d6f
Lol @ "the love sponge" /insert Seinfeld reference.
Thank you for the cautionary image of the bacterial bomb sitting there. Stagnation, energetic or physical, is the cause of most disease vectors, IMO. A little movement, and some clean, flowing water, can go a long way.
The jedi mind tricks is one reason I have had to harden my heart at times. I think I have fallen down when it comes to finding balance between hard and soft heart. Both are needed in different situations. Thank you for your thoughtful response. Much love <3
You are hilarious and insightful, my anti-labelist friend. This is a curse I've never considered quite this way. But I have thought a lot about the idea of 'suffering with others' and that it doesn't reduce their suffering one iota, only increases the net amount of suffering in the world.
For my oldest daughter, as a grief counselor, she takes her boundaries seriously and talks about the longevity of caring as inversely related to the intensity you allow. My middle daughter is not so naturally empathetic and I find that I can share more with her of other people's situations that I'm trying to sort out. And the youngest is my partner in seeing heartbreak on a global scale without getting dragged down by it. We share, in a sense, a hardness of the heart. If we didn't have it, we'd have to block it out of our awareness, for self-protection.
I recently told someone to keep your awareness large but your sense of well-being small. Look only at 'how am I right now? Are things okay for me?' You can't find meaning in anyone else's circumstance, only your own. Giving attention to how things work out in your own life can bring the trust that they'll work out, in the long run, for everyone. Not that bad things won't happen, but that they won't happen without meaning and purpose. Thanks for this perceptive essay.
Thank you for the complementary labels and the restack, especially friend, my friend. I theorize that those who are chosen to experience suffering with others are given the opportunity to help process those feelings and to transmute them into something useful/helpful. Like how dung can be be gross, but properly treated, can become fertilizer that helps beautiful things to grow, thrive and share the beauty. I can attest to "increase the net suffering in the world," when I would stew in the suffering, in self perceived defeat, the effects would spread out like spilling a can of paint.
I feel like I have been in the general type of space of all 3 of your daughters, at one point or another. Working hard on my boundaries, being able to look at the "spilled paint" of others without stepping in it, and the hardness of heart, which seems like layers of scars that can be a capacitor or impedance regulator of sorts, as you said a kind of self protection.
' longevity of caring as inversely related to the intensity you allow.'
'how am I right now? Are things okay for me?'
'Not that bad things won't happen, but that they won't happen without meaning and purpose.'
Love these gems and will need to examine and polish them up in my mind.
Thanks for sharing and giving me more to think about. I appreciate your existence!
'I appreciate your existence!' That's about the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me ;-)
Having the ability, and willingness, to dial up a healthy level of hardness of heart is useful in remaining sane and happy. Too much tugging on one's heart strings can't be a good thing.
True, those strings only have so much tensile strength and elasticity, everything wears down with too much use.
Thank you for the question Vbarnet. I was unclear about that statement. Also this article was a brain dump that I wrote while dancing with insomnia. I'm sure I could have said more, but the post was already long by the time I reached tiredness.
To me, aspects of empathicness can feel like a benefit sometimes, added insight/information about a person or situation and has brought about wonderful and strange/unique outcomes. Sometimes, the impressions served to confuse things further and I experienced, what I felt at the time, to be unwanted outcomes. I should have stated that being an empath, to me, can feel like a blessing or a curse, not that it is actually either one. What I shared is a mashup of how I have felt and thought about this topic at various times throughout my life, not how I feel about it currently.
I have attempted erasure AND suppression many times, I used to drink heavily when I was in a low vibrational state, to self medicate. Drinking and other methods never worked for very long, and the lessons that were intended became more painfully learned, because of my poor coping choices. Honestly, I think it is not possible to rid one's self of something the Universe wants one to have. Nor would I choose that option were it offered, now that I have had more perspective and time.
To FINALLY answer your question, the outcome I desire in help/training would be to be able to have more clearly recognized boundaries between internal, self generated sensations and those that arise from outside. Not knowing the difference is what has caused issues in the past.
Sorry for the longwinded, rambling response. I will reread my article and your thoughtful and well appreciated comment. After I have eaten some food and done other wake up rituals, I may feel the need to clarify more.
Much love <3
Good points and thank you. Love the mental image of electromagnetic wave transmission. And very good point on even the external can be modulated by by willpower.
I love rabbit holes and do study arcane philosophical ideas. I look forward to future discussions with you!